Your Story; dear Jane

Dear Jane,

We met this past weekend at the Chihuahuan Desert Bike Fest. It was 3:15pm on Saturday. You and your riding partner were climbing Pila de los Muchachos as you looked to complete the sixty mile Epic Loop. I was the sweep, it was I who made the decision to end your day.

Shortly after I summited Los Mexicanos, I caught a glimpse of two cyclists about half a mile ahead of me. Shaking my head, I cursed myself for allowing those six hung-over Team $uper Awesome riders to continue from Rincon fifteen minutes after the cut-off. “Damn you guys, don’t make me regret that decision; y’all should’ve been able to make these check-points with ease. Don’t make me cut you off at Muchachos” I swore aloud.

Earlier that morning I had promised Incident Command(IC) I would strictly enforce the cut-off times. My heart sank as I checked my watch; 3:15pm, fifteen minutes after the final cut-off. That you had used all your tubes to fix three flats those last ten miles, I feared something sinister was happening with your wheel/tire, something that would plague you further down the trail. My greatest concern was that you would be caught on the trails without lights as fatigue set in. As you acknowledged, that would have been bad for you and bad for the event. While I could not actually force you into that State Park pick-up truck for the drive to back Sauceda and eventually Lajitas, we all knew it was for the best. I admired you greatly for making that decision.

Jane, it broke my heart to see you sitting in the dirt, angry, frustrated, disappointed, crying behind your sunglasses. Cursing the event, cursing your three flat tires, cursing the forty miles of pain and suffering you’d conquered just to be stopped as the fun parts were to begin. It was up to me whether your day ended there or not, as it had been earlier with those T$A riders. I felt like the biggest jerk in the world. Sometimes, responsibility is a tough pill to swallow.

My first time sweeping the Epic, I felt more a part of the ride than when I had lead it. I knew who was behind me and who was ahead. I was able to fix Mitch’s wheel enough he could ride out from Rincon rather than walk those fifteen miles. I was in constant contact with IC relaying my locations, activities and incidents. I was having a blast, really enjoying this new role. That was until that role demanded I end your day. That moment caused me more pain than when I hurt my ribs crashing in Fresno Creek an hour later.

Sitting in the dirt atop Pila de los Muchachos, you claimed the ride thus far had been miserable, nothing but hard work. With tears streaming down your cheeks onto your bike shorts, you swore you’d never be back to challenge the mighty Epic Loop again.  We’ve all been there, we’ve all said those very same things, I certainly have.  Crying, cursing; swearing at my bike, the trails, my legs and my shame. Then I returned and conquered, as you will, armed with a determination nothing can stop.

Please accept this letter not as an apology but as thanks. Thank you for the honesty of your passion and your commitment to triumph. Thank you for making the right decision, painful though it was. Thank you for making my Epic ride truly, one to remember.

See you next year.

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Alex

Sweep; last off the trails and loving it.
Epic views
Isabelle and La Posta
9hrs 15mins, back at HQ. Photo credit Crystal Allbright
Pretty much sums it up. Photo credit Crystal Allbright

 

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